Eren still has his pants on; being shirtless is sort of a state of being for him since a little while before he got here. Clothes who? He doesn't give a shit.
He's stiff for a long moment when Dylan's arms come around him. Eren has never been good at comfort, not even back when he was relatively normal. Now he's all hard edges and weird bullshit that he can't escape from, even in his own head. But he does care about Dylan, obviously, so eventually he manages to just hold him and let him cry.
I used to cry like this, he thinks. When was that? A hundred years ago, feels like.
"It's hard to really hurt me," he says, which isn't exactly an answer. He kind of likes hurting anyway, the violence of it, something familiar in a strange place.
He realises how his answer sounds and amends, "No. I'm fine. That wolf thing packs a hell of a punch, though."
His eyebrows knit together just a little, the briefest hint that he's still actually a person despite his trying to distance himself from feelings.
"Don't worry about me. Are you sure you're okay? That transformation looks like it hurts."
Even knowing Eren isn't easily hurt (which was why he called Eren in the first place) -- it still bothers him this happened at all. That they fought and from the state of the surroundings -- it was bad. Blood everywhere, even if neither of them reflected the injuries sustained. It was bad, but it was also over. And Dylan should focus on that part.
He nods for a moment in place of words because he needs to calm down enough to speak. There's warmth and comfort in Eren's awkwardly returned embrace and Dylan takes a moment to soak that in -- to return to reality after losing time. It's over, it's over, it's fucking over for one more month.
"I'm good. I don't...remember it. So it might hurt when its happening, but once the wolf is out...I don't remember a damn thing. I just remember feeling so simultaneously hot and sick to my stomach and like something is about to burst, and then it goes dark. Like I've gone into a dreamless sleep."
His tongue traces his lips and he pulls his head back from Eren's shoulder where it had nestled temporarily.
"Or I guess got blackout drunk is probably a more accurate description. We should probably get out of here? There's a whole lot of blood and I don't really wanna sit here figuring out how much of it belongs to you or me. Can we go back to your place and get cleaned up?"
Eren knows Dylan is upset, obviously, but Eren himself isn't, really. Fighting is so much a part of his life that it's just in his bones, his soul, his whole being. He hasn't had a fight in a long time with anyone or anything that kept coming at him the way the werewolf could. If it hadn't upset his friend so much, he might have even enjoyed it. Not many people in Folkmore have hurt him, after all, not since Heine left.
Eren has some messed up feelings about violence, it's fine.
"I think the not remembering sounds a lot worse than the rest of it," Eren says, slowly. His own memories are a jumble of things, time out of order, the past and present superimposed over one another. That doesn't even touch on how many other people's memories he has now, 2,000 years of other titan shifters from several titans.
It's a lot. There's a reason he's as crazy as he is.
"When I first became a titan, I had something like that happen. I wouldn't remember what I'd done. I had to get a handle on that, though. It took awhile." Eren's own willpower and the help of his friends got him through it, but he has no idea if it's possible for Dylan to do the same with the werewolf transformation.
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dreamsofwings) wrote2021-07-13 03:17 am
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He's stiff for a long moment when Dylan's arms come around him. Eren has never been good at comfort, not even back when he was relatively normal. Now he's all hard edges and weird bullshit that he can't escape from, even in his own head. But he does care about Dylan, obviously, so eventually he manages to just hold him and let him cry.
I used to cry like this, he thinks. When was that? A hundred years ago, feels like.
"It's hard to really hurt me," he says, which isn't exactly an answer. He kind of likes hurting anyway, the violence of it, something familiar in a strange place.
He realises how his answer sounds and amends, "No. I'm fine. That wolf thing packs a hell of a punch, though."
His eyebrows knit together just a little, the briefest hint that he's still actually a person despite his trying to distance himself from feelings.
"Don't worry about me. Are you sure you're okay? That transformation looks like it hurts."
no subject
He nods for a moment in place of words because he needs to calm down enough to speak. There's warmth and comfort in Eren's awkwardly returned embrace and Dylan takes a moment to soak that in -- to return to reality after losing time. It's over, it's over, it's fucking over for one more month.
"I'm good. I don't...remember it. So it might hurt when its happening, but once the wolf is out...I don't remember a damn thing. I just remember feeling so simultaneously hot and sick to my stomach and like something is about to burst, and then it goes dark. Like I've gone into a dreamless sleep."
His tongue traces his lips and he pulls his head back from Eren's shoulder where it had nestled temporarily.
"Or I guess got blackout drunk is probably a more accurate description. We should probably get out of here? There's a whole lot of blood and I don't really wanna sit here figuring out how much of it belongs to you or me. Can we go back to your place and get cleaned up?"
no subject
Eren has some messed up feelings about violence, it's fine.
"I think the not remembering sounds a lot worse than the rest of it," Eren says, slowly. His own memories are a jumble of things, time out of order, the past and present superimposed over one another. That doesn't even touch on how many other people's memories he has now, 2,000 years of other titan shifters from several titans.
It's a lot. There's a reason he's as crazy as he is.
"When I first became a titan, I had something like that happen. I wouldn't remember what I'd done. I had to get a handle on that, though. It took awhile." Eren's own willpower and the help of his friends got him through it, but he has no idea if it's possible for Dylan to do the same with the werewolf transformation.
He glances around at the carnage in the snow.
"Yeah. Come on. We could both use a shower."