[ Eren probably should have specified that the Colossal took out the port, but it doesn't seem that important right now. Armin would never have exploded in the middle of the city, though.
That was all Eren's style. As it was, Armin was forced into a terrible position. Maybe one day Eren will be sorry for that. ]
You're right, they can't. Armin would be dead if he hadn't become a titan shifter. Almost everyone died that day.
[ Zeke. That was Zeke's fault. There's no reason to protect Zeke now or ever again. ]
Zeke killed most of the Scouts. Too many people were dead. It wasn't personal. It was just a war.
[ HALF TRUTHS. Everything that has ever happened, Eren has taken personally. Armin isn't like Eren, though, so that's mostly what he means. He doesn't bother saying it could have been Reiner or even Zeke instead. It couldn't have been; the future was already happening, though Eren didn't consciously know that then. But sure, theoretically, it could have been any of them. The Cart Titan saved Zeke and damned the world by doing so. That's how these things go. ]
I'm pretty sure Historia doesn't know.
[ HE'S NOT HELPING MUCH. He's trying to but he might make it worse. ]
Bullshit. You know better than anyone that it's personal
[ His best friend. His partner. His one and only. His Bertholdt.
Eren's best friend lived. Eren should know. Eren should understand, even if no one else ever can.
But Historia alone not knowing Bertholdt's fate…? That means Jean knows. Gabi and Galliard definitely know. Levi, Hange, Erwin—they all know. Does Annie know? How the hell is Reiner supposed to face her? What is he supposed to do, knowing that Bertholdt never had a chance to tell Annie that he loved her? ]
I can't
[ I can't do this.
No. Reiner doesn't get to say that. No matter how bad things are, he's never gotten to say that. So he changes course: ]
I can't be here right now
[ He can't be around all these people who withheld the truth for months. Can't trust himself to keep his emotions inside when they feel like they could burst through his skin. ]
I'm going to a Segment for a while. [ Then: ] Do you want to come
[ Maybe it was somewhat, but not in the way everything is for Eren. Ugh. He should tell Reiner the truth, but he's not going to write it down. That seems too impersonal, and Eren has grown beyond doing shit like that this week.
Come to think of it, Eren's not sure if Annie knows or not. He's not sure when she's from, exactly, or when she learns this anyway. Eren never saw Annie face to face again, not as a human. This Eren, here and now, only knows that she wakes up and fights against him with everyone. Whether he realises that her waking up is also his fault, who knows. ]
If you want me to come, I'll come.
[ JUST KIDDING he's already out the door. Leaving Reiner alone doesn't seem like the best option here. ]
[ Reiner doesn't text back. Instead, he activates the ring he wears, connecting himself to Eren by a red string only they can see. Showing Eren where he is, where to find him.
Then Reiner packs his supplies and heads out, joining Eren as they leave civilization behind. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dreamsofwings) wrote2021-07-13 03:17 am
no subject
He feels sick. Sick and small and stupid and such a worthless piece of shit. ]
I wanted it to be you. If the future had to hurt, I wanted it to be YOU. I told you that
no subject
[ Hits send too fast whoops. He has to think how to say it. ]
That's why I didn't show you what happened in Liberio. It would have been a shitty way to see it.
[ Half truths but that/s how Eren be. ]
I'm not good with words. I didn't know how to TELL you.
[ Again, a minute or two later. ]
I'm sorry. I wasn't keeping it from you to fuck with you.
no subject
He never imagined a crater.
Reiner tries to focus on something else. Anything else. ]
Pure Titans can't control themselves. They don't choose who they
[ —who they eat.
He recoils from his own words. Tries once again to focus elsewhere. ]
Was I the only one who didn't know
no subject
That was all Eren's style. As it was, Armin was forced into a terrible position. Maybe one day Eren will be sorry for that. ]
You're right, they can't. Armin would be dead if he hadn't become a titan shifter. Almost everyone died that day.
[ Zeke. That was Zeke's fault. There's no reason to protect Zeke now or ever again. ]
Zeke killed most of the Scouts. Too many people were dead. It wasn't personal. It was just a war.
[ HALF TRUTHS. Everything that has ever happened, Eren has taken personally. Armin isn't like Eren, though, so that's mostly what he means. He doesn't bother saying it could have been Reiner or even Zeke instead. It couldn't have been; the future was already happening, though Eren didn't consciously know that then. But sure, theoretically, it could have been any of them. The Cart Titan saved Zeke and damned the world by doing so. That's how these things go. ]
I'm pretty sure Historia doesn't know.
[ HE'S NOT HELPING MUCH. He's trying to but he might make it worse. ]
no subject
[ His best friend. His partner. His one and only. His Bertholdt.
Eren's best friend lived. Eren should know. Eren should understand, even if no one else ever can.
But Historia alone not knowing Bertholdt's fate…? That means Jean knows. Gabi and Galliard definitely know. Levi, Hange, Erwin—they all know. Does Annie know? How the hell is Reiner supposed to face her? What is he supposed to do, knowing that Bertholdt never had a chance to tell Annie that he loved her? ]
I can't
[ I can't do this.
No. Reiner doesn't get to say that. No matter how bad things are, he's never gotten to say that. So he changes course: ]
I can't be here right now
[ He can't be around all these people who withheld the truth for months. Can't trust himself to keep his emotions inside when they feel like they could burst through his skin. ]
I'm going to a Segment for a while. [ Then: ] Do you want to come
[ He doesn't want to be alone.
He's never felt more alone in his life. ]
no subject
[ Maybe it was somewhat, but not in the way everything is for Eren. Ugh. He should tell Reiner the truth, but he's not going to write it down. That seems too impersonal, and Eren has grown beyond doing shit like that
this week.Come to think of it, Eren's not sure if Annie knows or not. He's not sure when she's from, exactly, or when she learns this anyway. Eren never saw Annie face to face again, not as a human. This Eren, here and now, only knows that she wakes up and fights against him with everyone. Whether he realises that her waking up is also his fault, who knows. ]
If you want me to come, I'll come.
[ JUST KIDDING he's already out the door. Leaving Reiner alone doesn't seem like the best option here. ]
no subject
Then Reiner packs his supplies and heads out, joining Eren as they leave civilization behind. ]