Reiner doesn't answer Eren's first question, simply waiting as Eren accepts the gift, setting about unwrapping it. The smile lingers on Reiner's lips for a bit, but it falls as nervousness settles on him again, the fear of rejection (never strong enough, fast enough, smart enough, good enough) crawling up his spine.
He's not ignorant. He understands the significance of giving someone a ring. The fact that these are magical rings doesn't detract from that significance; if anything, it amplifies it.
It doesn't have to mean anything more than what they want it to mean.
(Reiner wants it to mean everything and more.)
Eren stares at the matched rings, color rising in his cheeks. Reiner doesn't realize how intently he's watching until Eren looks up; still, he doesn't stop.
"Yeah. I do." He holds Eren's gaze, steady despite his fear. "I've wanted to give you this for a few months. I kept waiting for the right time…"
He trails off, releasing a little huff of laughter. The right time. What a ridiculous concept for two young men whose ages are flipped, times misaligned, both struggling to stay in the present (plagued by the future; plagued by the past). What would "the right time" even be?
"It hasn't changed," Reiner continues, steady again. "Knowing the future hasn't changed that. I still want to give you one, Eren. This one is for you." He reaches out to indicate one of the rings. "The other one's for me.
"They're magic," he adds. Not because it isn't obvious, but because Eren should know what the rings do before deciding. "If we activate them, we can find each other no matter where we are."
As distant as Eren often is — a thing Reiner might now understand more — he's not a total idiot. He gets the ring thing too, apart from magic and whatever else. Reiner is staring at him too intensely, but Eren doesn't shy away from that. There's nothing left to shy away from in each other now, is there?
For a few months, Reiner says. He'd been thinking of it for awhile, waiting for…well, who knows. Eren to leave. Eren to stay. Eren to smile. Everything to end in whatever way.
It could. It will, someday, in another world Eren hopes neither of them ever look at again.
But they have now, this, the stolen time that they both hold onto. It isn't quite hope in Eren's head, because he hasn't had that in a long time. Still, it's something warm inside him, that thing they haven't named, the way it feels when Reiner smiles at him.
Always, Reiner had typed right where anyone could see it. And now he came to Eren with this — rings that match, that mean anything in the world. Eren has never done anything by halves, of course. It means whatever they want. It means the world, right, the inevitable cost of loving Eren and being loved by Eren.
Reiner knows that cost and he still wants it.
Eren's mouth twitches a little, a little more sincere than that smirk he likes to wear despite what he says next.
"So you can never hide from me, huh?" he asks. Of course that works both ways. Of course either of them could take it off. None of that is the point.
There was a time those words might have been a threat, but they aren't now. It's just a tease, as light as Eren manages to get even if it's not in the best taste. He can still only be what he is.
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He's not ignorant. He understands the significance of giving someone a ring. The fact that these are magical rings doesn't detract from that significance; if anything, it amplifies it.
It doesn't have to mean anything more than what they want it to mean.
(Reiner wants it to mean everything and more.)
Eren stares at the matched rings, color rising in his cheeks. Reiner doesn't realize how intently he's watching until Eren looks up; still, he doesn't stop.
"Yeah. I do." He holds Eren's gaze, steady despite his fear. "I've wanted to give you this for a few months. I kept waiting for the right time…"
He trails off, releasing a little huff of laughter. The right time. What a ridiculous concept for two young men whose ages are flipped, times misaligned, both struggling to stay in the present (plagued by the future; plagued by the past). What would "the right time" even be?
"It hasn't changed," Reiner continues, steady again. "Knowing the future hasn't changed that. I still want to give you one, Eren. This one is for you." He reaches out to indicate one of the rings. "The other one's for me.
"They're magic," he adds. Not because it isn't obvious, but because Eren should know what the rings do before deciding. "If we activate them, we can find each other no matter where we are."
no subject
For a few months, Reiner says. He'd been thinking of it for awhile, waiting for…well, who knows. Eren to leave. Eren to stay. Eren to smile. Everything to end in whatever way.
It could. It will, someday, in another world Eren hopes neither of them ever look at again.
But they have now, this, the stolen time that they both hold onto. It isn't quite hope in Eren's head, because he hasn't had that in a long time. Still, it's something warm inside him, that thing they haven't named, the way it feels when Reiner smiles at him.
Always, Reiner had typed right where anyone could see it. And now he came to Eren with this — rings that match, that mean anything in the world. Eren has never done anything by halves, of course. It means whatever they want. It means the world, right, the inevitable cost of loving Eren and being loved by Eren.
Reiner knows that cost and he still wants it.
Eren's mouth twitches a little, a little more sincere than that smirk he likes to wear despite what he says next.
"So you can never hide from me, huh?" he asks. Of course that works both ways. Of course either of them could take it off. None of that is the point.
There was a time those words might have been a threat, but they aren't now. It's just a tease, as light as Eren manages to get even if it's not in the best taste. He can still only be what he is.