Eren Jaeger (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dreamsofwings) wrote2021-07-13 03:17 am
dreamsofwings) wrote2021-07-13 03:17 am
ic contact;
text | audio | in person
text | audio | in person
He'll like it because it's beautiful and because you made it for him.
This is where that book you got me is supposed to come in handy, huh?
Honestly, I think he'd still be happy if you handed it to him raw, but if you want to go the extra mile of working it into something he'll be extra smitten.
You really think so? But why? Why would he want something like that?
Being given something pretty, or something they made for you, from the person you like is always nice. It's the same principle behind giving people flowers and jewelry.
[ They indeed do, and Levi will do his best to suffer through it until he gets the chance to dart off into the bathroom, but he still has a slight grimace on his face as he arranges the paper around the burger so he doesn't have to touch it directly with his hand and slowly, carefully, takes another bite. Some sauce drips on the tray and he almost shudders, but at least he hasn't smeared any on his face (yet). ]
[ He'll grab a couple of fries to shove into his mouth as well for the complete experience, and take a few moments to chew and consider. ]
Yeah, sure. It's very... rich?
[ The flavor is nice, but he honestly doesn't think it tastes anything like any meat he's had the chance to try so far. Maybe the sauces are messing it up. ]
[ He'll grab a couple of fries to shove into his mouth as well for the complete experience, and take a few moments to chew and consider. ]
Yeah, sure. It's very... rich?
[ The flavor is nice, but he honestly doesn't think it tastes anything like any meat he's had the chance to try so far. Maybe the sauces are messing it up. ]
You can do more than move forward; you'll have to start trying to do better.
I know you can't change the future any more than you already have, by staying here and therefore not causing it to happen. But at some point you'll have to be sorry for what you did, and try to make amends.
I'm not saying you don't already, it seems like you do. [ At least, from Marco's perspective. ] Reiner can't change what he did. I didn't forgive him. But he wants to do better, and that's what makes me what to be his friend. If that makes sense?
I know you can't change the future any more than you already have, by staying here and therefore not causing it to happen. But at some point you'll have to be sorry for what you did, and try to make amends.
I'm not saying you don't already, it seems like you do. [ At least, from Marco's perspective. ] Reiner can't change what he did. I didn't forgive him. But he wants to do better, and that's what makes me what to be his friend. If that makes sense?
Yeah.
I didn't start arguing with him about it, since he started acting weird, and we were in a cafe.
But hopefully he'll come to understand.
I didn't start arguing with him about it, since he started acting weird, and we were in a cafe.
But hopefully he'll come to understand.
Oh. You think even something he knows I can do could matter like that?
You know there's no making amends for it, right? I haven't done it when I'm from, but a bunch of people already lived through it.
[ This is the weirdest thing to consider, since he has done it in his future memories, and at this point there's not a functional difference. Well, maybe at the end of it he'll have filled in the holes, all the things he hasn't yet figured out or learned. But the outcome, no matter what he does, is always the same.
The world in exchange for a handful of lives and Eren's humanity.
Also he's just not sorry! He's had years (lifetimes) to deal with this however he's going to deal with it. There are some people he might be sorry for. Those children in Liberio, refugees who were already treated like shit. Hange. Levi, at least on some level.
Eren cannot be sorry for the world. They were right to hate him and he knows it. ]
But I promised the captain I would be better. I am trying to do that.
[ As best he can, even if it's not always great. ]
It makes sense. I'll never forgive Reiner and them for what they did. I don't expect Reiner to forgive me. It doesn't matter, though. We're still
[ Shit, what are they? Enemies? Not now. Boyfriends? No, that seems like a silly word for it. (mathlady.gif) ]
We still care about each other.
[ This is the weirdest thing to consider, since he has done it in his future memories, and at this point there's not a functional difference. Well, maybe at the end of it he'll have filled in the holes, all the things he hasn't yet figured out or learned. But the outcome, no matter what he does, is always the same.
The world in exchange for a handful of lives and Eren's humanity.
Also he's just not sorry! He's had years (lifetimes) to deal with this however he's going to deal with it. There are some people he might be sorry for. Those children in Liberio, refugees who were already treated like shit. Hange. Levi, at least on some level.
Eren cannot be sorry for the world. They were right to hate him and he knows it. ]
But I promised the captain I would be better. I am trying to do that.
[ As best he can, even if it's not always great. ]
It makes sense. I'll never forgive Reiner and them for what they did. I don't expect Reiner to forgive me. It doesn't matter, though. We're still
[ Shit, what are they? Enemies? Not now. Boyfriends? No, that seems like a silly word for it. (mathlady.gif) ]
We still care about each other.
He knows you can do it, but you haven't done it for him before, right? It'll still be special.
You two understand each other, I think. One of the few who understand what it's like to... do that. Even if you haven't done it here yet.
[ Eren knew he'd eventually make the decision. Eren sharing the paths, that'd been a result of everything Eren decided to share with Reiner. It's not like he can judge them, either. He's cozied up quick to Galliard, who is from the same country that Reiner was sent from to attack them. ]
I care about him too. You both deserved better.
[ Eren knew he'd eventually make the decision. Eren sharing the paths, that'd been a result of everything Eren decided to share with Reiner. It's not like he can judge them, either. He's cozied up quick to Galliard, who is from the same country that Reiner was sent from to attack them. ]
I care about him too. You both deserved better.
[ This was maybe poorly chosen because of Levi's intense dislike of messiness, but whatever. Eren still likes burgers because they're so…unlike anything they could have found at home. Meat, cheese, whatever else. He doesn't care about the texture, just the taste.
Fries are probably less messy at least? ]
Yeah, rich is a good way to put it. I don't think it's like other stuff I've tried.
[ After a couple minutes: ]
Do you have a favourite food here you've tried? Something you never saw at home?
[ Eren is aware that Levi grew up in the Underground, so his perspective is different. But still, they'd all been living with scarcity the whole time Eren was in the Scouts, up until the Marley volunteers came and started cooking sometimes - that man that liked Sasha, always cooking things. Eren barely remembers the time they spent with the volunteers now, caught in the tide of other memories. ]
Fries are probably less messy at least? ]
Yeah, rich is a good way to put it. I don't think it's like other stuff I've tried.
[ After a couple minutes: ]
Do you have a favourite food here you've tried? Something you never saw at home?
[ Eren is aware that Levi grew up in the Underground, so his perspective is different. But still, they'd all been living with scarcity the whole time Eren was in the Scouts, up until the Marley volunteers came and started cooking sometimes - that man that liked Sasha, always cooking things. Eren barely remembers the time they spent with the volunteers now, caught in the tide of other memories. ]
He gets defensive. I guess because that's his home. It's hard to realise that where you came from has lied to you or used you.
[ He would know. ]
Good job not getting in an argument in a cafe though.
[ He would know. ]
Good job not getting in an argument in a cafe though.
I don't think I did deserve better.
[ How can he, when he's been the same his whole life? He just didn't know it. (It's flawed logic; no one, not even Eren, is a static person. But he says this kind of shit all the time anyway.) ]
Reiner did. Annie. Bertholdt. Marley took kids so young. It fucked up my dad's first family like that.
[ He can recognise that Zeke's genocide against their own people is Zeke's own bullshit fault, but Grisha had made him feel like he didn't matter. That's on their dad. Eren's never excused Grisha for his actions either. (Eren has never really excused or forgiven anyone for anything.) ]
You didn't decide to hate me either, huh?
[ How can he, when he's been the same his whole life? He just didn't know it. (It's flawed logic; no one, not even Eren, is a static person. But he says this kind of shit all the time anyway.) ]
Reiner did. Annie. Bertholdt. Marley took kids so young. It fucked up my dad's first family like that.
[ He can recognise that Zeke's genocide against their own people is Zeke's own bullshit fault, but Grisha had made him feel like he didn't matter. That's on their dad. Eren's never excused Grisha for his actions either. (Eren has never really excused or forgiven anyone for anything.) ]
You didn't decide to hate me either, huh?
You all deserved not to be used as weapons. Especially you, Eren.
[ At the question though, well... ]
It wouldn't be my choice to make - I was already gone when you made your decision. I won't hate you here.
[ At the question though, well... ]
It wouldn't be my choice to make - I was already gone when you made your decision. I won't hate you here.
I chose to be a weapon. It's all I know how to be.
[ He doesn't bother explaining it, and he won't, but he says things like this all the time. ]
For what it's worth, I'm glad you don't.
[ He doesn't bother explaining it, and he won't, but he says things like this all the time. ]
For what it's worth, I'm glad you don't.
[ It's fine. He can wash his hands later. Also his face. And then his hands again. The point is, he's able to suffer a mess when it's necessary, and this is... well, re-bonding with Eren, sort of, so clearly it's important enough to overlook some discomfort. ]
[ ...He still keeps the paper in an attempt to lessen the amount of sauce that ends up on his fingers, though. And, of course, he still manages to eat it more cleanly than most people might, even if he looks a little stiff as he uses the provided paper napkin to clean up. ]
...I don't know. Most of it is good.
[ This is really a food paradise, compared to back home overall and especially the underground. Sasha would have loved this place, huh? Levi doesn't know if he can pick a favorite; it would probably change depending on what's the freshest memory in his mind. Anything from the fancy peach cake to the pancakes that Erwin makes most mornings nowadays. ]
[ But that's a boring non-answer, and they're trying to have quality time here, so after a moment he adds; ]
Have you ever had a "peach smoothie"?
[ ...He still keeps the paper in an attempt to lessen the amount of sauce that ends up on his fingers, though. And, of course, he still manages to eat it more cleanly than most people might, even if he looks a little stiff as he uses the provided paper napkin to clean up. ]
...I don't know. Most of it is good.
[ This is really a food paradise, compared to back home overall and especially the underground. Sasha would have loved this place, huh? Levi doesn't know if he can pick a favorite; it would probably change depending on what's the freshest memory in his mind. Anything from the fancy peach cake to the pancakes that Erwin makes most mornings nowadays. ]
[ But that's a boring non-answer, and they're trying to have quality time here, so after a moment he adds; ]
Have you ever had a "peach smoothie"?
[ Sometime after the talk with Hange, Levi's going to beckon Eren over to the kitchen table when he next spots him around the house. ]
Oi, Eren. Got a minute?
[ He even slides a cup of tea over to him. Is he in trouble? But he hasn't done anything new, has he?.. ]
Oi, Eren. Got a minute?
[ He even slides a cup of tea over to him. Is he in trouble? But he hasn't done anything new, has he?.. ]
[ Eren follows Levi to the kitchen. He's a little slow sitting down. Tea. What's the tea for? Levi tends to give him tea when he's not in trouble, he's noticed, but...he can't guess at all what this is about.
He looks back up from the cup, face carefully neutral to avoid looking worried. He mostly succeeds. ]
What is it, Captain?
He looks back up from the cup, face carefully neutral to avoid looking worried. He mostly succeeds. ]
What is it, Captain?
Guess that shows I've gained some self-control over the years, huh?
Though, if it had been you, I might have not been so lucky.
[He mostly just says that to lighten the mood a little.]
Though, if it had been you, I might have not been so lucky.
[He mostly just says that to lighten the mood a little.]
[ True. Tea is very specifically a "you deserve some nice things right now" occasion, but if his reading of Eren's face is correct, it seems that didn't fully reassure him. Oh well. ]
[ He takes a breath, clears his throat. ]
...We're thinking of moving to a house. Hange and I. Erwin too, he just doesn't know about it yet. Anyway--
We'd like you to come, too. ...If you want.
[ He takes a breath, clears his throat. ]
...We're thinking of moving to a house. Hange and I. Erwin too, he just doesn't know about it yet. Anyway--
We'd like you to come, too. ...If you want.
[ Eren's eyes go wide — he's more expressive than he was a year ago, though he'll probably never be like he was as a kid — as he listens to Levi talk.
It's the last part that gets him, though. He figures from the start of it, that it's Levi leaving. It makes sense; even if Eren didn't think whatever it is he thinks about Levi and Hange, why wouldn't they want to live together?
Erwin too.
He adds that into his pile of things he's not sure he wants to know about the adults. ]
You…really?
[ He's still under some impression that Levi stays here to babysit him. He's vaguely aware that's not entirely true these days, but he figured it was why this situation never changed. He might even take this as evidence that's still true, if not for how Levi words it.
It's not an order or a threat or a suspicion. It's more like an invitation. ]
It's the last part that gets him, though. He figures from the start of it, that it's Levi leaving. It makes sense; even if Eren didn't think whatever it is he thinks about Levi and Hange, why wouldn't they want to live together?
Erwin too.
He adds that into his pile of things he's not sure he wants to know about the adults. ]
You…really?
[ He's still under some impression that Levi stays here to babysit him. He's vaguely aware that's not entirely true these days, but he figured it was why this situation never changed. He might even take this as evidence that's still true, if not for how Levi words it.
It's not an order or a threat or a suspicion. It's more like an invitation. ]
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