dreamsofwings | seasons overflow

from here

Eren walks a knife's edge saying things like that, gaslighting Reiner into second-guessing himself. He's not exactly grounded in reality himself, here, especially after spending too much time in his memories and in other people's thanks to those metal titan things. Reality is difficult, a tenuous thing that twists around him, something he's lost hold of since he kissed Historia's hand years ago. He knows Reiner has troubles with it, pushes that button on purpose because he can, though what he expects to get out of it…

Well, he's not Armin. He can't plan contingencies all that well. He can plan for a future he knows, but not for one he doesn't, and not as well for something immediate. He's too reactive for that. He just has to take the consequences as they come.

He knows, too, what he's doing moving his hand like that, pressing on a vulnerability. That's what it is, what it will always be for either of them even when they're just human (as if they're ever just human). He doesn't really push it, though he could, the threat lingering unspoken because he's Eren and Reiner is right to distrust him.

Strangely, unexpectedly, he didn't kiss Reiner to hurt him. His words, his other bullshit actions, sure. Those are designed to cut. He said he didn't want to fight (a half-truth) and he said he promised to be better (he did, but what that means in a situation like this, even he doesn't know), but that first press of lips on his skin took was too far outside of what he expected. No planning left, only reaction. Only the rain driving him.

Or at least he can blame the rain. What will he do later when he doesn't have that to hold onto? Who and what can he blame then?

Rage and desire are so hard to separate out, especially like this, with someone he understands so well and someone he has hated so much and been so furious at. But he bled that hate out of himself, redirected it at a world that cannot stand against him. He has/will hurt so many people, some of whom he loves enough to ruin everything for them. What's one more?

He's out of his league with this, though, but he can't admit that even to himself.

He knows better than to let an enemy see his weakness, but Reiner has seen so much of him. They lived together when he was younger, after all, when he was weak all the time, before any of them knew he was a titan at all. He was so emotional then, getting in fights with Jean, yelling, crying, flying off the handle at everything. Somewhere inside his repression he is still that boy with all his very human weaknesses, much as he tries to deny them.

Without thinking, his now free other arm finds its way around Reiner's shoulders and there's no way in the world it's not obvious that he likes this, Reiner's hand too tight in his hair and the way Eren's own tense pseudo-resistance causes those teeth to scrape too hard. He's never cared much if he bleeds. He wants to.

Is this a fight or something else he can't name? Hell if he knows.

He crashes their mouths back together. Too much teeth at first, the bone-jarring clash of them. But then there's (slightly) more art to it this time, if whatever this is could be called art. Eren could never deescalate anything he's done, of course, and he doesn't even make an attempt. There's no space left between them and he can taste blood on his tongue when he presses it against Reiner's lips. Everything he does now is a challenge or a demand. It could be something desperate, years of being alone and touch-starved and haunted. Maybe Reiner doesn't deserve to bear the weight of it, Eren taking out his bullshit on him like this. Here they are anyway.

from here

Eren has seen Kyle's warnings several times about this lightning. He has never once believed them, since he's been here through several storms and it's been fine. Well, now he'll be a believer, won't he?

By the time he finds Zechs, he's only been hit once, but Zechs might not be so lucky. He recognises the other man, of course, from when they met in the desert. Is this better? It feels better, at least. Eren is still only wearing what he had from Euphoria, something he certainly didn't pick but got stuck in himself, tight black pants and a cropped shirt. It's hardly his usual fare. At least whatever was going on in there has worn off, but that still leaves…the lightning.

"Zechs," he says, drawing closer, trying to resist the urge to just reach out and touch, hands balled into fists at his sides. This is a losing game. "It's not safe out here. This lightning is…messed up."

Edited 2023-06-15 16:02 (UTC)

[ from here ]

[ How Eren ends up in the portal is anyone's guess, but this kind of thing is just…happening all over the place, huh? He's immediately on edge, since the last one of these he fell into was literally a war zone. But this one…doesn't look so bad, actually. Sure, Eren has complicated feelings about oceans and all of that, but it's still nice here.

Until! There sure are bombs going off! This is already a memory, which mercifully prevents Eren from spiralling out into his own memories, at least more than he already does just generally. He doesn't get lost in a flashback, but he's still really on edge.

He remembers Diluc from fire training, but the little girl isn't familiar. She's the one thrown bombs, and Diluc doesn't seem at all rattled by it. Eren tries to follow out, but he's not good at that with all that dangerous sound happening.

They're standing in the water, Klee joyfully bouncing along. ]

Wait, we're bombing fish?

Edited 2023-07-07 20:08 (UTC)

from seasons TDM with Reiner

folkmore - zechs, jun 2023 event, nsfw

diluc; seasons memory overflow

seasons - august and september quests