Eren toes a line with his words. Sometimes he knows he goes too far. What does he want to give away? He's not always sure. There are things he's never told anyone, won't even tell Armin at the end of the world. He will die with so many secrets.
Though he meant to die with the fact that he'd cut off his own leg, and Levi knows now. They haven't talked about it. (We don’t do that here.) He's not even sure if Levi consciously remembers. He'd rather not know.
Reiner, in the future, could put that together. Reiner here doesn't need to know about Liberio, let alone the looming end of the world. He might give it away, on purpose, on accident, in anger or in desperation.
Not today. Today they're supposed to be celebrating. Eren hasn't put much stock in birthdays for a long time. Before he knew about the titan timer, they were just the passage of time. Congrats, you didn't die for another year.
Now, on the other side of knowing, on the other side of when he should have died, he's not sure what to do. He should be 19 forever. He shouldn't still exist.
He does not want to die. Not at 19 or 20 or 23. It hasn't entirely sunk in that the whole thing is different.
But he made cookies for Reiner, also counting down a timer in his mind. They're going to get a cake that is also ice cream? Incredible.
"I never cared about money," Eren says. He never even thought about money. The military paid for what it paid for. He didn't need anything else; if they were hurting for food everyone else was too. Shelter was paid for. If you died and there was anything left to bury, that was paid for. If you were too injured to function again, paid for.
"But I cared about food. How could we not, you know?"
It's not an accusation. It's just a question, mostly rhetorical. Reiner lived in the same conditions he did as a cadet. The famine was inadvertently his fault (and Bertolt's, and Annie's, they weren't off the hook in Eren's mind). But he didn't magically have food either as far as Eren knows.
But Eren has been to Liberio too. They had food available but it was...less than stellar. That last day, the ice cream and whatever, that was a special occasion. A special occasion where Willy Tybur declared Eren the number one threat to Marley and Eren proved him right.
Here, they could get whatever they wanted for cheap. A few quests and it's all you can eat all the time.
"I'm glad you like them," he says, and means it, pretending he's not as pleased as he is by not meeting Reiner's eyes.
They reach the teleporter. It's something Eren still isn't used to even months later. Folkmore was different, and actually weirder. But either way it's strange to be one place then immediately somewhere else. For someone who gets sideways in time regularly, it's disorienting.
Without thought, he reaches for Reiner's hand before they step through, using that touch like he has done repeatedly since Reiner got to Ellipsa: as an anchor. It might not be fair, but it's not as unfair as he could be, not by a long shot.
this got away from me and I rambled on orz
Though he meant to die with the fact that he'd cut off his own leg, and Levi knows now. They haven't talked about it. (We don’t do that here.) He's not even sure if Levi consciously remembers. He'd rather not know.
Reiner, in the future, could put that together. Reiner here doesn't need to know about Liberio, let alone the looming end of the world. He might give it away, on purpose, on accident, in anger or in desperation.
Not today. Today they're supposed to be celebrating. Eren hasn't put much stock in birthdays for a long time. Before he knew about the titan timer, they were just the passage of time. Congrats, you didn't die for another year.
Now, on the other side of knowing, on the other side of when he should have died, he's not sure what to do. He should be 19 forever. He shouldn't still exist.
He does not want to die. Not at 19 or 20 or 23. It hasn't entirely sunk in that the whole thing is different.
But he made cookies for Reiner, also counting down a timer in his mind. They're going to get a cake that is also ice cream? Incredible.
"I never cared about money," Eren says. He never even thought about money. The military paid for what it paid for. He didn't need anything else; if they were hurting for food everyone else was too. Shelter was paid for. If you died and there was anything left to bury, that was paid for. If you were too injured to function again, paid for.
"But I cared about food. How could we not, you know?"
It's not an accusation. It's just a question, mostly rhetorical. Reiner lived in the same conditions he did as a cadet. The famine was inadvertently his fault (and Bertolt's, and Annie's, they weren't off the hook in Eren's mind). But he didn't magically have food either as far as Eren knows.
But Eren has been to Liberio too. They had food available but it was...less than stellar. That last day, the ice cream and whatever, that was a special occasion. A special occasion where Willy Tybur declared Eren the number one threat to Marley and Eren proved him right.
Here, they could get whatever they wanted for cheap. A few quests and it's all you can eat all the time.
"I'm glad you like them," he says, and means it, pretending he's not as pleased as he is by not meeting Reiner's eyes.
They reach the teleporter. It's something Eren still isn't used to even months later. Folkmore was different, and actually weirder. But either way it's strange to be one place then immediately somewhere else. For someone who gets sideways in time regularly, it's disorienting.
Without thought, he reaches for Reiner's hand before they step through, using that touch like he has done repeatedly since Reiner got to Ellipsa: as an anchor. It might not be fair, but it's not as unfair as he could be, not by a long shot.